Recently I heard that my class senior from JC just passed away. I wouldn't know if not for lixiang.. My class was not close to my senior's class.. and I would guess they didn't know about it either.
Tho I did not really know the girl(lets call her D) well, it came as a shock when i received news of her death. It is just shocking to know that the living, breathing person whom i had talked to and laughed with is no longer in this world.
Tho I didn't attend her wake(if i had i'm sure the impact would have been much greater), it did make me feel the meaning of the sentence 'life is transient'. I have always been a person who had preferred to have a few good friends.. there is a saying that goes something like "Acquaintance of many, friends of none". I had always believed in that. Now, i think otherwise. U never know when your friends will depart from this world. In the busyness of life, there is always time to get to know pple better.. and to be of impact to them before it is too late.
D had committed suicide. Rumours has it that she had suffered from depression. She had always done superbly well in her studies.. a good life is cut out for her. Why then had she chosen this road for herself? It is a mystery that no one will know.
During her wake, her good friend was giving a speech. Hearing this from my friend who attended, this good friend of D said, " Sometimes I wish she wasn't so perfect. I wish I had been more observant to notice the crack that had appeared on this perfect vase.. a crack that wasn't big enough to let pple come in. " (Can't remember the exact words.. it was something along that line..)
Sometimes, we can be our worse critic in our strife for perfection. D was a christian. She had Jesus in her life. But that was not enough to stop her from taking her own life. My friend asked whether she would go to hell for committing suicide.. i didn't know how to answer him..
I hope D is with God now.. life is so full of uncertainty. Dun let the busyness of life deter u from cherishing ur friends and family now.. it is so important to let them know u love and care for them.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Monday, March 05, 2007
Mercy Me - Word of God Speak
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak
I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say
I shared during cell last time that besides feeling God's presence.. the only way that I know God is with me is when He speaks. This song echoes how i feel at this moment in time...
Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain
Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place
Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness
Word of God speak
I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say
I shared during cell last time that besides feeling God's presence.. the only way that I know God is with me is when He speaks. This song echoes how i feel at this moment in time...
Timeless, literally
Psyching myself up for the weeks to come.. there's so much to do.. everything is so tight. During missions night Pastor Mohan talked about resources.. that it doesn't matter how small or few the resources are.. as long as we entrust it into the hands of God, it will be sufficient. That really spoke to me... comitting to attending all the practices for the Easter event requires a huge show of faith. Every inch of me is tempted to hold on to the limited time and energy that i have.. just to cope with the major project deadlines, tests and assignments that are always due just before the exams, much to the frustration and annoyance of all. But somehow.. this time i feel that i should take part in Easter.. maybe its wad God has put into my heart.. so.. i'm just going to go along with it.. and ignore the sensible voice in my head that shouts for control.
Presenting to you, the Trinity Easter event for 2007!
Presenting to you, the Trinity Easter event for 2007!My dad was fetching me to school this morning in the car.. i looked out of the window and for the first time, appreciated the many trees that lined the roadside. Spaced at regular intervals, they provide shade from the sun and shelter from the rain. And suddenly i had this impression in my head.. that similarly, God puts people in our lives to help shelter us from the pressures of life. As we travel along the road of our lives, these people help and guide us.. and it is due to the contributions of these people that we grow.. and hopefully, we will one day become a tree to others and provide the same help that we had received.
Maybe u are travelling on ur road.. a road that no one else but you can travel on.. maybe u feel tired and alone.. but fear not, the next tree is in sight. We know because God has said he will never leave nor forsake us.. He will never give us something that is too much for us to handle..
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Recess week, not
First day of recess week was spent in FAL doing my accounting project. My group is supposed to come up with a master budget for our assignment. Thank God for my projectmate, eunice who is really good at excel(her mom is a IT lecturer).. cos i simply CMI in IT... i managed to learn a couple of things or two from her.. like how to use short-cuts. Believe me.. so much work can be reduced by just using Ctrl+c and Ctrl+v.. cos excel can apply the saved formulas to the different cells.. plus, the program actually learns and modify itself... *shock* i din know a software can do that...so smart.. anw, we managed to finish slightly more than half of the assignment after like 8 hours.. so going back on fri to finish the rest.
Today, i'm trying to brainstorm an idea for TVC assignment.. we're required to prepare a storyboard and come up with an advertisement commercial(in video form) for a product.. must produce a 15 pg write-up in creative brief format somemore.. help.. no ideas are coming to my head.. i need inspiration soon..cos the deadline is next tues and that's like in 1 weeks' time.. and i need someone who knows how to edit videos.. rong i hope u're seeing this.. *sends SOS distress signal*
The above.. plus one 4 pg report of an interview for my GE, is just about sufficient to occupy the whole of recess week. Hai.. its not gonna be a break at all..
Well, at least there's something to look forward to. Next sunday is melvin and weisum's wedding! They are the first of my friends who are getting married.. haha. It's gonna be their special day.. i'm feeling excited for them. (:
Today, i'm trying to brainstorm an idea for TVC assignment.. we're required to prepare a storyboard and come up with an advertisement commercial(in video form) for a product.. must produce a 15 pg write-up in creative brief format somemore.. help.. no ideas are coming to my head.. i need inspiration soon..cos the deadline is next tues and that's like in 1 weeks' time.. and i need someone who knows how to edit videos.. rong i hope u're seeing this.. *sends SOS distress signal*
The above.. plus one 4 pg report of an interview for my GE, is just about sufficient to occupy the whole of recess week. Hai.. its not gonna be a break at all..
Well, at least there's something to look forward to. Next sunday is melvin and weisum's wedding! They are the first of my friends who are getting married.. haha. It's gonna be their special day.. i'm feeling excited for them. (:
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Restless
The lunar new year has just passed.. really blessed this year. Received a big ang pow from my uncle cos he struck 4D.. both me and my sis gets a share..
That aside, 4 good days of rest has been more than enuff. In fact, it has made me restless.. how ironic. See, that's what happened to me when i've got too much time on my hands.. instead of doing what i'm supposed to do(like assignments for one), i think too much.
I look at the happenings around me... people, family situations, external family relations, circumstances... and I can't help but wonder. why can't things be different? And i think back to a point in time when i really wanna grow up.. so that i can change things.. instead of accepting things the way it is..
I've just got this nagging feeling that i'm missing a lot in life. There must be so many things that i've yet to experience, and things that i can learn and be really good at. Maybe it is time to look pass the restrictions..to follow my heart and do what i've always wanted to do.
oh ya.. i've recently fallen in love with deep purple. Bought a purple bag and a purple top.. and i almost wanted to buy a purple dress today but managed to practise restrain. think i better keep my ang pow $$ in the bank and bury my debit card somewhere where i can't see it.. hmmm..
Alright.. homework's calling out to me. I haven't done my tut which is due tmr.. pls pardon my rattlings.. just in a queer mood..
That aside, 4 good days of rest has been more than enuff. In fact, it has made me restless.. how ironic. See, that's what happened to me when i've got too much time on my hands.. instead of doing what i'm supposed to do(like assignments for one), i think too much.
I look at the happenings around me... people, family situations, external family relations, circumstances... and I can't help but wonder. why can't things be different? And i think back to a point in time when i really wanna grow up.. so that i can change things.. instead of accepting things the way it is..
I've just got this nagging feeling that i'm missing a lot in life. There must be so many things that i've yet to experience, and things that i can learn and be really good at. Maybe it is time to look pass the restrictions..to follow my heart and do what i've always wanted to do.
oh ya.. i've recently fallen in love with deep purple. Bought a purple bag and a purple top.. and i almost wanted to buy a purple dress today but managed to practise restrain. think i better keep my ang pow $$ in the bank and bury my debit card somewhere where i can't see it.. hmmm..
Alright.. homework's calling out to me. I haven't done my tut which is due tmr.. pls pardon my rattlings.. just in a queer mood..
Friday, February 16, 2007
The mystery of chemistry
Just feel like penning down some thoughts going through my head.. and the topic of the day is: chemistry. Wad exactly is chemistry? Wikipedia defines chemistry as the science of matter at the atomic to molecular scale, dealing primarily with collections of atoms, such as gases, molecules, crystals ,and metals. Ok.. i'm just being lame.. I'm not a science student so obviously i'm not blogging abt the interaction between atoms and stuff like that. Instead, wad has stirred my interest is not so much chemistry in the scientific sense, but rather interpersonal chemistry.
In the fields of sociology, behavioral psychology, and evolutionary psychology, with specific reference to intimate relationships, romantic relationships, or friendships, interpersonal chemistry is a feeling of affiliation, bonding, or comfort, which is sometimes present in the first fifteen minutes of meeting someone new(source:wikipedia). Chemistry can persist for years in friendship or a sexual relationship, but as it pertains to first dates and meeting strangers, it refers to a rather immediate feeling of rapport, comfort and liking. Sexual interest may be present but is not required. It may also be used to define a strong sexual attraction, sometimes without the presence of the feelings of compatibility, comfort, rapport, etc.
Then there is good chemistry and bad chemistry. Good chemistry is thought to be associated with or the result of favorable human bondings and associations, whereas bad chemisty results in awkwardness and feelings of discomfort.
Chemistry would perhaps also contributes to the extent of camaraderie between friends and the feeling of closeness. Ever wondered why some friendships potentially gets deeper.. but some pple never get beyond surface talk? Well.. that's chemistry for u!
Each of us has our own chemical make-up. We are like walking bottles that contain our unique blend of chemical components within.. looking for other bottles to match and compliment what we have. Too bad there isn't any labels.. bottles with the matching components would have been much easier and clearer to spot..
In the fields of sociology, behavioral psychology, and evolutionary psychology, with specific reference to intimate relationships, romantic relationships, or friendships, interpersonal chemistry is a feeling of affiliation, bonding, or comfort, which is sometimes present in the first fifteen minutes of meeting someone new(source:wikipedia). Chemistry can persist for years in friendship or a sexual relationship, but as it pertains to first dates and meeting strangers, it refers to a rather immediate feeling of rapport, comfort and liking. Sexual interest may be present but is not required. It may also be used to define a strong sexual attraction, sometimes without the presence of the feelings of compatibility, comfort, rapport, etc.
Then there is good chemistry and bad chemistry. Good chemistry is thought to be associated with or the result of favorable human bondings and associations, whereas bad chemisty results in awkwardness and feelings of discomfort.
Chemistry would perhaps also contributes to the extent of camaraderie between friends and the feeling of closeness. Ever wondered why some friendships potentially gets deeper.. but some pple never get beyond surface talk? Well.. that's chemistry for u!
Each of us has our own chemical make-up. We are like walking bottles that contain our unique blend of chemical components within.. looking for other bottles to match and compliment what we have. Too bad there isn't any labels.. bottles with the matching components would have been much easier and clearer to spot..
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Happy moments
Happy 21st bdae to me!
It has been 4 day since I turned 21…I know this post is a lil late..
Some thoughts of turning 21:
- I’m now officially an adult… I’m finally grown up!
- It’s now time to give back after receiving so much from my parents... Turning 21 comes with it the responsibility to take a more proactive role in seeing things in my family work out for the better, be it relationships, financial aspects, etc. And more importantly, salvation for my dad and sis!
An interesting fact: Some friends whom I had known for so long forgot my bdae, while some friends that I had made for less than 2 years remembered and were among the first to drop a happy bdae msg. My best fren from JC called to say happy bade from montreal! (:
Turning 21 has brought several things into perspective. One of the question I asked myself is.. out of this 21 years.. who are my real friends? Friends that I can trust.. friends who will stand by me in times of trial.. friends who will be there for me. Do I have this kind of friends? I thank God that the answer is yes..
Thinking back now.. I’m amazed by how things had changed.. God has slowly, but surely been working in my life. I’m glad that God has brought many people into my life to teach me things that can never be learnt by myself. Covenantal relationships are indeed a blessing from God.
On a final note…
Turning 21 is not about parties, expensive gifts, or fancy affairs. Gifts lose their novelty and memories fade, but true friendships last. Turning 21 is a celebration of independence, knowing that at the onset of adult life, you have friends and loved ones there by your side, those who will walk with you through the journey of life.
Some thoughts of turning 21:
- I’m now officially an adult… I’m finally grown up!
- It’s now time to give back after receiving so much from my parents... Turning 21 comes with it the responsibility to take a more proactive role in seeing things in my family work out for the better, be it relationships, financial aspects, etc. And more importantly, salvation for my dad and sis!
An interesting fact: Some friends whom I had known for so long forgot my bdae, while some friends that I had made for less than 2 years remembered and were among the first to drop a happy bdae msg. My best fren from JC called to say happy bade from montreal! (:
Turning 21 has brought several things into perspective. One of the question I asked myself is.. out of this 21 years.. who are my real friends? Friends that I can trust.. friends who will stand by me in times of trial.. friends who will be there for me. Do I have this kind of friends? I thank God that the answer is yes..
Thinking back now.. I’m amazed by how things had changed.. God has slowly, but surely been working in my life. I’m glad that God has brought many people into my life to teach me things that can never be learnt by myself. Covenantal relationships are indeed a blessing from God.
On a final note…
Turning 21 is not about parties, expensive gifts, or fancy affairs. Gifts lose their novelty and memories fade, but true friendships last. Turning 21 is a celebration of independence, knowing that at the onset of adult life, you have friends and loved ones there by your side, those who will walk with you through the journey of life.
Monday, January 29, 2007
Seasons
The large magnitude of school work coupled with the unexpectedly increase in serving that had hit much like a silent tsunami ever since the start of 2007 had subsided.. the waves of anxiety and paranoia has slowly retreated.. leaving in its wake not a trail of death and destruction.. but rather, quiet, comtemplative relection.
I remember countless times of telling God it's too much too fast.. slow down.. it's too much for me to handle. Everytime i open my mouth to complain, God never fails to remind me of the story of how the people had grumbled against God as Moses lead them out into the desert. In the land of suffering and discomfort.. they had lost sight of God's promise for them. Without vison, the people perish..God has already given me a vision and a promise for 2007.. and the wonder of it all is, part of it is being fulfilled even right now.
The tangible works of God.. all in His perfect timing.
1) Entry into CM as singer
2) Invitation extended for L-cell
3) Stepped up as MEX i/c
4) Adopted an SB (one who complains that a good mummy will not bully her..)
Doors opened by God? I believe so..
I am reminded once again of God's perfect timing.. of how important it is to learn all that God intended for one to learn in that special season.. bcos once that season is past.. it's gone.. and it is not until one enters into the next season that one realises how God has actually been using the past season to prepare for this one.
The path to fulfilling one's destiny is not by participating in the rat race of life.. but by entering wholly into the timely seasons of God..
I remember countless times of telling God it's too much too fast.. slow down.. it's too much for me to handle. Everytime i open my mouth to complain, God never fails to remind me of the story of how the people had grumbled against God as Moses lead them out into the desert. In the land of suffering and discomfort.. they had lost sight of God's promise for them. Without vison, the people perish..God has already given me a vision and a promise for 2007.. and the wonder of it all is, part of it is being fulfilled even right now.
The tangible works of God.. all in His perfect timing.
1) Entry into CM as singer
2) Invitation extended for L-cell
3) Stepped up as MEX i/c
4) Adopted an SB (one who complains that a good mummy will not bully her..)
Doors opened by God? I believe so..
I am reminded once again of God's perfect timing.. of how important it is to learn all that God intended for one to learn in that special season.. bcos once that season is past.. it's gone.. and it is not until one enters into the next season that one realises how God has actually been using the past season to prepare for this one.
The path to fulfilling one's destiny is not by participating in the rat race of life.. but by entering wholly into the timely seasons of God..
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